Mind Boggling Phenomena - Apparently Repetition Is Key

Recent Subway Interaction:

Lost Ladies: Excuse me. Does this train go to Forest Hills?

Your Humble Observer: Actually, Forest Hills is in the opposite direction on this train line. This goes to Bay Ridge

LL: (confused look)

YHO: You have to take the 'R' line in the opposite direction to get to Forest Hills.

LL: (continued confused look) How do we do that?

YHO: Just hop off at the next stop, go to the opposite platform and ride in the opposite direction.

LL: Oh, opposite platform? Ok, thank you.

...2 minutes pass...

...Random Goofy Guy approaches YHO and the Lost Ladies...

RGG: To get to Forest Hills you have to take the 'R' train in the opposite direction. Go ahead and get off at the next stop, go to the opposite platform and get on the train going the other way.

YHO and LL: (blank stare)

RGG: I'm the conductor of the 'R' train. I'm just going to work now. To get to Forest Hills you have to go in the opposite direction

YHO and LL: (continued blank stare, becoming a little suspicious)

RGG: But thank you to that guy, he had the directions right on. 

YHO and LL: (staring as if to imply WTF?)

RGG: Ok, good luck to you. (exits train)

LL: (confused blank stare)

YHO: (glaring and muttering) So...I got the directions right, but you decided you needed to repeat everything I just said anyway...twice. Phenomenal!

Because Domani Never Comes...

Please turn your gaze left and welcome to the blogging world Steph who's living for today. Check it out!
Living for the Today

In Texto Veritas - ...But Let Me Tell You About My Day

From: YHO
Date: 3/23/09
Time: 16:24 - 16:42

"I simply cannot wait to answer the following question on the site evaluation at the end of my rotation: 'Did you feel like you were part of the health care team?'
My answer: 'Absolutely! My integral role as glorified blood tube delivery boy was my foremost reason for choosing medical school and the medical profession. When the resident calls me up for an important task and I come running, and he tells me to run the tubes to the lab, I wet myself a little...And when the pharmacy rejected me as a suitable candidate to deliver medication to an actively dying woman, the thrills almost made me vomit.
And just as I got done typing that last part, I was addressed by the only name I've ever known for the last 6 months...'Medical Student!'"

"I want to spontaneously combust."

So...How do YOU think my day went?

Do You Speak Resident?

Today has been the greatest day for conversations with the residents. Here are a few examples...

Conversation #1

[Background: Thursdays are academic days where we are not responsible to scrub into cases]

Res: Hey, the chief needs you to go scrub into a case with him in OR 1

YHO: Scrub in?

Res: Ya, you know, that thing where you wash your hands and wear clean clothes to do surgery

YHO: Thank you, I'm familiar with the concept
Res: Just get over there and scrub in.

YHO (Staring dumbly at his phone)

Conversation #2

Chief Res (mumbling something unintelligbily)

YHO to Intern#1: Dr. O, where is it the chief said we had to go?

Intern #1: Oh, sorry...what? Did they say something? I wasn't listening.

YHO to Intern #2: Dr. J, did you happen to catch what the chief just said?

Intern #2: Huh? He said something?

YHO (looking sideways at the two "brain surgeons" who somehow already have MD behind their names)

Conversation #3

YHO: Do they perform [heart] valve replacement surgery here?

Res: Valve replacement is easy. It's like changing a bolt on some machinery.

YHO: Well, it's something I'd really be interested in. Are there any cases like that?

Res: It's an easy operation. Just a tiny incision.

YHO: That's fine, but I'm telling you that it's something I'd really want to see. So do they perform that procedure at this hospital?

Res: They have a new method now. It's called the "gun approach". They put the valve in a gun and shoot it right at your chest and the valve goes in.

YHO (glaring at the resident)

Res (smiling back like an idiot, so profoundly proud of his little jokes)

I wonder if anyone has invented the "gun approach" to replacing a sense of humor. Boy would I LOVE to shoot that at his head.

Turns Out He's Just A Politician After All

On behalf of the politically jaded, let me say that this article neither surprises nor angers me. I can't continue to anger year after year, every time this article comes out in one form or another. I just don't have the energy...

Shocker of the Century

Mind Boggling Phenomena - Locker Room Philosphy

The following overheard in the gym locker room:

"Do you know what I was thinking today? You never see a white guy or lady working as meter maids anymore. It's mostly black or Hispanics. You know why that is?"

"No I've never noticed."

"I don't think white people have the personality for it."

"Ya, I mean you're being yelled at constantly, putting up with abuse. White people can't handle that..."

This line of deductive reasoning continued for over 6.5 minutes. There were some things said that I can't remember, but the entire conversation made me yell internally "REALLY? IS THIS APPORPRIATE CONVERSATION FOR THE MIDDLE OF THE DAMNED LOCKER ROOM?!?!?"

Writing On The Wall - Purulence Is Bliss

Please welcome the worlds worst superhero:

Located on the outer door of the elevator in the hospital basement. 

NO! I Don't Want No Scrubs.

Scrub is a word thrown around a lot in hospitals, medical offices, and most importantly, on bad TV medical dramas. So what exactly does "scrub" mean?

scrub 

[skruhb]: verb -- 

1.  to cleanse something by hard rubbing 2. to cleanse one's hands and arms as a preparation to performing or assisting in surgery   (often fol. by up or in) The process of scrubbing is long, tedious, and rough on the skin. It involves using a brush like the one pictured below and systematically rubbing the hell out of your skin, right down to the dermis (that may be an exaggeration).  Surgery in theory is meant to be a completely sterile process. "Scrubbing in" to a surgery makes one sterile and is the only way to play an active role in the surgical field. After scrubbing, the participant must properly gown and glove oneself and take care not to contaminate him- or herself. Contaminating involves anytihing from touching non-sterile equpiment, brushing up against non-sterile individuals, picking your nose, adjusting your mask, etc. As medical students, we either love or loathe scrubbing in, depending on one's point of view (to put it mildly Your Humble Observer is LESS than interested in surgery and, by extension, scrubbing). For example, scrubbing into a 5 hour cystectomy...not our idea of a crazy good time. scrubs  [skruhbs]: noun --  1.  protective garment worn by surgeons during operations Actually, scrubs refer generally to the uniform tops and bottoms worn by medical professionals in general. During operations, surgeons will wear sterile gowns OVER their scrubs. A typical pair of scrubs are pictured below.  scrub  [skruhbs]: noun --  1. as per TLC: "a scrub is a guy who can't get no love from me. Hangin' out the passenger side of his best friend's ride, tryin' to holla at me" Scrubs  [skruhbs]: noun --  'nuff said