A Plea

As a matter of trying to keep the dialogue civil on "Keeping An Eye...", Your Humble Observer made a conscious decision to avoid delving into the political battle brewing just outside his Brooklyn apartment window. I've engaged in political topics in the past, as the loyal readership will remember. It was fun. It was mind-numbing. It was mind-boggling. And we're over it. So in 2012, we refrained from explicitly exploring the exciting world of Decision 2012.

However, as I sit here in the apartment in my cold empty apartment, I am a man personally torn. For years I refused to engage in the act of voting, much to the chagrin of many around me. I simply refused to play the stupid game. It began as an act of political rebellion (although I'm not exactly sure how... you'll have to ask 2000 YHO) and continued as a figurative waving of the flag of apathy. After years of this hard-line stance, in 2012 YHO finally gave in to the political game and registered to vote. And yet I sit, as torn as the first sentence of this paragraph.

I can't decide. I'll admit, I'm not exactly the best-informed political consumer. I know some things, but I'm not as politically well-versed (or Versed?) as I or any American should be. I can't decide. I don't have a candidate and I simply don't know.

Fortunately, the founders of the country didn't make any provisions about the ability to vote based on level of information that I have.

STOP!!!!!

I know there is a certain percentage of you who just had the thought, "Ya, well, there SHOULD be a provision on stupid people voting." Anyone who thought that can just stop reading right now, because there is no way in hell I can have an intelligent discussion with you. The right to vote, the ability to vote, the obligation to vote is not and should never be based on intelligence, education, or level of information.

Ya, I know it pains you elitists out there to hear those words, but there are so very few things that offend me more than hearing how "stupid people" should simply not be allowed to vote. It is so intellectually offensive to make the claim - and I know it's out there. I've heard it since 2000 Bush v. Gore.

So here I sit. An educated man. Unsure. Undecided. Fortunately for an idiot like me, there is Mr. Jeff Greenfield. Mr. Greenfield is a veteran of the news industry, and I'm sure very good at what he does. He wrote a wonderful piece called "My Plea To The Undecided: Stay Home!". Well, needless to say, this perked my ears up. Let's see what he thinks, shall we?

"As the momentous day approaches, with epochal consequences for an anxiously awaiting world, I take pen in hand—make that apply fingertips to keypad—to renew a traditional plea I first made more than 30 years ago...

It’s a plea directed to those of you who are still uncertain about which way to vote. And it’s as simple as it is heartfelt: Stay home."

Interesting. Well, at least the title wasn't misleading. He goes on to explain that for 6 years both major candidates' lives, policies, proposed policies, and even their magic underwear have been thoroughly explored and made available to the public. His conclusion? If you don't know by now,

"You have the reasoning power of a baked potato."

You know, considering how stupid I am, I always fancied myself a tater-tot. We continue. Next is the disclaimer that there is a small minority who are actually well informed but still undecided. I thought he might be referring to me, but he proceeds to discount that this may actually apply to YHO.

"So it strikes me as a sound, honest statement for a prospective voter to say: “Look, I haven’t given this election a minute’s thought, and it’s just not fair for me to cancel out the vote of someone who actually gives a damn.”

Indeed, it’s not just sound and honest—it’s the ethically responsible thing to do...

Allow me a Family Feud moment here as I give Mr. Greenfield a big giant:

X

"So if you’re one of those folks who have stayed utterly disengaged through all of this, do the honorable thing: Honor those for whom the vote really matters by staying home.
You’ll be doing yourself—and the country—a favor."

Apparently, party-line and single issue voters who literally haven't given a second thought about voting for the candidate they've been sure of are more eligible voters than myself, someone actually torn by the issues at hand. I shouldn't in good conscience cancel out their vote (PERISH THE THOUGHT!) by actually exercising my right, uninformed as I am.

I don't know if Mr. Greenfield knew my situation and was using some reverse-psychology mumbo-jumbo to get me to go rock the vote tomorrow. What I do know, is that I am SO thankful he has weighed in on the undecided voters such as myself. Now I can go back to my 3 recorded football games and worry more about my fantasy picks. Apparently, that will do less harm to this country than casting my ballot.

I'm glad Mr. Greenfield's opinion has been voiced. I don't know if I was able to illustrate what a dangerous line of thinking this is. Maybe I haven't. I don't have the writing skills or political acumen as a 5-time Emmy winner. What I do know, is that discouraging voters under the premise of "Leave the voting to those who know best" is utterly elitist, unethical, and disgusting based on the founding principles of this country.

So I say go cast your ignorant votes tomorrow. Otherwise, you may be standing in line behind me at the "License To Breed Bureau".

Read the article and tell me where I went wrong.

Stay Home